Help your child to deal with exam stress

Exam stress mostly comes down to a fear of failure and the pressure young people tend to put on themselves when it comes to passing or failing an exam. Your child may feel they have a lot riding on the results, or perhaps they simply don't want to have to re-sit an exam later down the line. Sometimes, the stress may even come from other people. Teachers, family or peers may unintentionally create additional pressure if a young person feels expectations to do well. Whatever the reason, stress around exams, and even waiting for results, can have a big impact on their life. They might not feel ready, even if they've spent lots of time studying. It can sometimes feel like no matter how much they read or learn, they're still struggling to take it in. Ironically, anxiety about forgetting everything can make it harder to actually retain information.

It's important to notice when your child is showing signs of stress, especially during exam periods. Spotting these signs early can help you support them before stress starts to feel overwhelming.

You might notice some physical signs like:

• Feeling tired or struggling to sleep
• Headaches or tummy aches
• Feeling restless or shaky
• Changes in eating, like eating too much or too little

You might also notice feelings like:

• Feeling anxious or grumpy
• Mood changes
• Feeling overwhelmed or finding it hard to relax
• Negative thoughts or doubting themselves

Look out for behaviour signs such as:

• Putting off studying or not starting revision
• Finding it hard to concentrate
• Spending less time with friends or family
• Doing nervous things like biting nails or pacing

If your child struggles significantly with anxiety around exams, you may notice symptoms associated with panic attacks, such as breathing fast, feeling lightheaded or having a fast heartbeat. If this happens regularly, especially around exams, speaking to their GP may be a good next step. Talking to their school can also help, as accommodations can be made for students who really struggle.

At Aviva, we offer a 24/7 Digital GP app* for our health customers, so if your child is on your policy, they can usually be seen on the same day. A GP can help explore solutions that may help in the short and long term, such as medication or talking therapies. 

*Non-contractual benefit which can be changed or withdrawn at any time.

Before their exam

How you support your child in the days and weeks before their exams can help them manage stress. Here are some simple tips:

• Make a revision timetable: Help them plan what to study in small parts and spread it out. This can help reduce last-minute panic and give them a clear plan.
• Try relaxation methods: Encourage simple techniques such as deep breathing or quiet time to help calm their mind and body. You could also read our guide on stopping worrying together.
• Stay active: Encourage exercise such as walking or stretching, which can help boost mood and reduce stress.
• Eat healthy and drink water: Good meals and regular hydration can help maintain their energy levels. Try not to rely on too much sugar or caffeine, as this can sometimes make stress and tiredness feel worse.
• Stay close with friends and family: Spending time with supportive people can help. Talking through worries or simply having fun can make a real difference.
• Speak with their school, college or university about support: Many institutions understand how stressful exams can be. If your child has a condition such as an anxiety disorder or is neurodivergent, they may be able to offer support or reasonable adjustments, like a smaller room or quieter space for taking exams.

On the day of an exam

When exam day comes around, helping your child stay calm and focused can help them do their best. Here are some things to try:

• Arrive early: Help them get to the exam venue with plenty of time to spare. Rushing can increase stress before they even begin.
• Use calming techniques: Encourage slow, deep breathing if they're feeling nervous. For example, breathing in for four seconds, holding for four seconds and then breathing out for four seconds.
• Don't cram at the last minute: Trying to learn lots of information right before an exam can feel overwhelming. Encourage them to trust the preparation they've already done and focus only on a few key points if needed.
• Use positive words and affirmations: Reassure them about the effort they've put in. Simple reminders such as "you've worked hard for this" can help build confidence.
• Take time to understand the questions: Remind them to read each question carefully and make sure they understand what's being asked before answering.
• Once they've finished, relax: Whether it's their final exam or not, encourage them to take some time to unwind afterwards. Enjoying a hobby, spending time with family or seeing friends can help them recharge. It can also be helpful to avoid analysing the exam in too much detail afterwards, as this can lead to unnecessary second-guessing.

These ideas can help your child approach exam day with greater confidence and see it as an opportunity to show what they've learned.